From the old website, here’s a great Did You Know by Narkotic in 2003:
Did You Know?
Most NAF teams are short on cash due to their horrendous spending on Star Players, secret weapons and bribed Refs. To balance their budget, some Coaches take desperate measures that may bring fresh money into their coffer but proves to be fatal on the long run. For example, the chaos mutant team Broke Rogues completely ruined their reputation after signing a contract with the local carnival that required weekly attendances at the freak show! The famous Twin Peakers moved their stadium from the Dwarven Kingdom to the distant settlement of Goblinville, where tax issues are totally unknown. Not much time had passed and the Dwarven team not only lost their dignity but all their fans, as well. The Elven Sissy Strikers decided to star in commercials for female underwear. To their relief nobody recognized any difference in their sports dresses anyway.
NAF Fact #1
The most successful goblin Team known so far are the Gigglehead Gibbons. The secret of their success has nothing to do with their (non-existent) playing skill or knowledge of dirty tricks but rather can be tracked down to their Polka obsessed fans. At every match this devoted followers play the most annoying and silly Polka known in the old World called Oompha like a clown which drives every opponent crazy with it monotonous brainwashing silliness, causing them to wander aimlessly around the pitch and paving the way for glorious Gibbon victories.
Do You Remember?
Bigg “I’m Fed-Up” Lyer was the most notorious sports commentator in the history of Cabalvision. He used to host a daily Blood Bowl coverage named Take the Skinkheads Bowling and was known to be ruthlessly biased. After the Orcish Graceless Wardens lost the 4025 finals with a score of 0:5, Lyer reported that the match had been a stand off with the other team a little in the lead. On the height of his popularity he published his book Do Beastmen dream of mutated sheep in which he revealed insider knowledge about NAF machinations. This did cost him much street credibility and put him on the hit list of leading NAF sports officials. Not much later, he disappeared mysteriously while attending a Dungeon Bowl match. Alleged witnesses claim that he had been forced onto a defect teleporter platform by two vicious looking Ogres when the Cabalvision cameras were switched off for broadcasting commercials. He hasn’t been seen since that day…
NAF Fact #2
As the Blood Bowl merchandise craze increases with every year, the stadiums have stopped being arenas for sportive competition only. Instead, many teams have enhanced their stadium to offer an unique experience for the fan-crowd who is more than willing to pay for some fancy extras. Some of the famous sports grounds include: The Jurassic Park Stadium of the Lizard Dundees. The pitch is enwalled with electric fences to prevent larger Sauri to stomp onto the pitch. Quite naturally, pitch invasions still occur as the whole security system is not much reliable. Despite this stadium being located within a Mosquito infested swamp, the Jurassic Park became a crowd puller due to the incorporated shopping mall famous for a large variety of Crocodile leatherworks. The Narcotic Drinkers have named their home ground Yee Ole Oak Barrel Stadium which is situated on a mountain top above the clouds, resembling, you probably already have guessed it, a gargantuan version of an old wooden beer barrel with no lid on top. Admittedly, the freezing cold is some sort of a letdown but where else the famous all-Dwarven Chill Con Carnage tourney could be held? A team from Araby, the Flying Carpets, are said to own a magnificent, legendary and mythical stadium, studded with gems and outfitted with precious silks. Unfortunately, nobody has actually seen the El-Mirac Mirage Stadium in real. We have to rely on what the stadium brochure says because there are no living fans who survived the 15 day trip through the Desert of Salty Death and came back living to tell.
Do You Remember?
The three Black Orc Blockers, Grim, Grimm and Grimmm (aka The Brothers Grim) are the only non-Skaven players who managed to speak a reasonable amount of Skaven tongue. In fact they are the only Orcs ever to speak a foreign language at all. They have been integrated into Skaven (sports) society because of them being raised by Skaven stepparents, who found them in the local garbage can – a common place for Skaven families to gather their lunch. Unfortunately, due to their limited mental capacities, they seem to have forgotten everything else they ever had learned, including to speak Orcish and basic Blood Bowl rules, which makes the average Troll look bright in comparison. Nevertheless, the Brothers Grim are the top crowd-puller of the Rodentheim Rowdies, renowned for their display of senseless violence. To accommodate their three star players, the Rodentheim Rowdies management decided to hire the Orc cheerleader legend Loretta ‘Putrid’ Cactus. Her chant seems to address particularly her three kinsmen in the Skaven team. It goes as follows:
Grim, Grimm, Grimmm,
Grim, Grimm, Grimmm,
Grim, Grimm, Grimmm,
Grim, Grimm, Grimmm,
Grim, Grim,??? Give it to him
Grimm, oh GRIMMM!???